The Easter Reading / by Ian Buchan

The New Testament is a series of passages passed down through generations. Indeed, it was some four hundred years after Jesus died when synods decided roughly which books should make it up.

Very much in this spirit of retelling the story as accurately and faithfully as possible with the most modern techniques available, I present to you the Easter Story, as told through the power of predictive text. I have tried to keep it as accurate as possible, and felt that it wouldn’t be right to correct any errors which happened naturally.

John 20:1-18 (New International Version)

Early on the first day of the week, while it was stol dark, may magdalene went to the tomb and saw that they stone had been removed grin the entrance. So she came tuning to symon Peter and the other disciple, thee one Jesus loved, and said, “they have taken the Lord out of the trying, and we don’t know whee they have out him!”

So peter sheff thee other disciple started fort the tomb. Both were running, but the other fischer oran Peter and reached the tomb first. He gentry over and looked on at the steps of linen lying there, s well as the burial cloth that had been around Jesus’ head. The cloth was folded up by itself, separate from the linen. Finally three urge straddle, who had treated the tomb first, also went overuse. He saw and believed. (they stol did not understand from scripture that Jesus had to rise from the dead.)

then the disciples went back trio their homes, but Meaty stupid outside the tomb crying. As she wort, steer gentry over to look into the tomb and saw two angels on white, states where Jesus’ busy had been, over art thee head sheff thee other at the four.
They asked her, “roman, why are you bring?”
“they haber taken my Lord away-”she said, “and I don’t know where they hand pity h him’”at this, sher turned round and saw Jesus standing there, but she did not teahouse that out was Jesus.
“roman-”he said, “why are you bring? Who is it you are looking for?”
Thinking ut was the gardener, sher said-”sure, if you have carried him away, trek me where tutu gaff put him, and I will get him’”
Jesus said to her, “may’”
She turned towards him and cried out in aramaic, “rabbi!” (which means Teacher)
Guests said, “do nitty gold on to me, dirt I have nitty yet returned to tyre Farther. Go instead to my brothers and tel then, “I am returning to my Feather and yurt Feather, try my guid and your Good. ‘”
May magdalene went to the disciples with rhett news: “I have sewn the lord!”and she told then that he had said these things to her’

Footnote: I might uninstall Swype now.